Storms

Be thou the rainbow in the storms of life. The evening beam that smiles the clouds away, and tints tomorrow with prophetic ray. 
   Lord Byron  

I found this quote while trying to describe how I was feeling and how we are being hit by a large storm off the East  Coast. Sometimes, I forget entirely, that I have control over my self. I may not be able to control others (really, why would I want to do that...well, maybe if it meant a 2nd small piece of cake) but I can control my self. My big problem is I read things too fast. I make a decsion quickly and often misread or misunderstand what is being written. I have to slow down and think, okay, this is what I've read. Take a deep breath and read 2 more times and don't let my my emotions dance all over the place. Because what usually happens, is I'm emotional from the first reading...even if there wasn't a valid reason to be upset. Makes sense, right? ;) 

So, what I need to do is slow down and read between the lines. What is really being said? Taking a deep breath and asking questions helps. If I listen, I can usually understand what is being said and people can understand me as well. 

cats always make me feel calm

Being that calmness while the world storms, is how we survive the storm. Today, I had someone yell at me for not attending an event. I was honestly afraid to travel because we're having an actual storm and wanted to keep my family safe at home. Instead, they yelled at me for not coming and mocked me. I kept thinking if I were this persons friend, truly, would they have said this? I just hung up on them because they acted like a child (this person is older than I am) and was being bullying and mean. The sad thing is, if this person had been calm and reassuring (and kind), I might have been tempted to go out in foul weather...but as it was, they made the descion much easier. So, we are home, safe and warm. I guess that is what was supposed to happen. The sad thing is I know it will be me who will have to make peace (the childish behavior won't all this person to apologize...quite the opposite). 

I just wish I could take the above quote and say, see this, this is what you're supposed to be aiming for. Not yelling at someone for wanting to be safe. 

Gathering leaves before the storm takes them away.

 

 

 

Anyway, it's better to be the one to say they are sorry (just make sure you've written out your feelings and worked out why). If you make peace, you're heart will feel lighter and you'll have grown a little more love inside of you. It's hard to do, but it's worth doing. Grudges are not fun and are lonely things. Plus, it's such an ugly word when you think about it. ;) Happiness looks and sounds so much better.