Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Why is it the little things that bug me so much? Why don't I let them go? My daughter's visit/stay on ocassion with a neighbor who runs a little daycare from her home. We stopped by about two weeks ago and my youngest brought her Pikachu. When we left, they couldn't find it. We looked and looked and couldn't find it. I felt bad. My youngest felt bad but seemed confident that she'd get it back. We haven't gotten it back and now...now, I'm angry and annoyed. But, hey! It's just a toy. A silly little toy...I liked it too but now it's gone because the nieghbor didn't care to give it back and watch other little hands that may have wanted it. It's always something at this persons house...it rubs me the wrong way. They're the same ones that cut my rose bushes to bits and the same one that allowed my youngest to be mawled on at one point. So, I have grudges...I want my damn Pikachu! :(
What a feeling to have awoken up from at 4 am...Yes, I even had a stinkin' nightmare from it. Good grief.
My back hurts from giving piggy back rides and playing with my gals all day. We had fun but now I'm sore. Perhaps more time at the park is in order. Apparently, I'm getting a tan. This is a first as previous years I had so many migraines I couldn't enjoy going out. I think I still have a bit of this hiding in the house behavior to overcome...I've only had two or three major headachess this summer as opposed to one or two a week! So, I'm getting better.
Norrie's b-day was great! She had so much fun and was very spoiled. But this is all right. Lydia was jealous and was having a hard time with transitioning from all the double gifts and what not (not by me but by auntie/grandma).
In other news, my 1st book "Emily and Mr. Nelson" apparently had a snag. The PDF's I downloaded for the lulu.com didn't go thru (though they did the first time!) and I had to redo ALL the pages. Jon is going to condense them into one PDF file and I'll be able to put it back on-line. I was SO frustrated as I worked on this for hours and hours (probably over 30 hours) just to get it on lulu.com. So, sigh...I even did an on-line chat and got the ball rolling on info/etc. So, now I'll just have to wait for Jon to get the final step done, and it should (cross my fingers) be done! Then, I will be able to order 5 or so copies and send them to various places. I need to find out about bulk printing as well...but we shall see.
Still other news, I'm working on another book and will be getting that one done soon. It should be cute and for kids as well.
I really want to finish my Graphic novel but feel I need to do more historic research. I'll have to do it soon...maybe I can make this a birthday wish. Oh, and today is my 35th birthday. I know some people would say, hey your so old. And others would say, you're just a baby! I'll go with the latter, thank you!
I watched a behind the scenes of "The Cat Returns" and it was amazing to see the animators, planning and thought. I LOVED it. I wish I could be apart of Studio Ghibli. I feel, in this regards, resentful of living in the US and not Japan. I know this is silly...plus, I wish I could speak/write/read in Japanese and be an illustrator for Miyazaki. lol! What a confession....dream...
Monday, July 30, 2007
Friday, July 27, 2007
I watched one film clip of Chaplin's called "The Dictator". The speech Chaplin gives is so moving and frighteningly prophetic for our times now, I can't believe I'm listening to something from the 1930's. Or then again, I can. These are the words that should have been in the film "Forrest Gump" when Gump gets cut off from speaking...and are absent from nearly all mainstream arts/films.
It's strange that so much of mainstream art and music seems to be devoid of this passion and truth. I don't think all art has a responsibility to be critical of events in the world, but I do think some should be there...and heard. If it's not being heard, then why isn't it? I know that the FCC (Federal Commission Communications) has lots of restrictions, but to the point where TV is just full of garbage to sell? This is why nobody wants to watch television...it's full of lies and meaninglessness. At least in the 1940's when a lot of bans where placed on films, the message was still there, if encoded. I sometimes think more rules would make people more creative (inregards to television).
Thank the stars for youtube and libraries! And thank goodness for those artists who stood up to speak, even though they were afraid and often where persecuted...such as Chaplin was.
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
I loved reading this story:
About a Chihuahua saving his owners grandchild from a rattlesnake bite. It's very true that dogs will protect their owners. I can say this about Mr. Nelson. He's saved me by warning me several times I had left a pot on the stove and it was starting to boil/smoke. He's done this at least 3 times. Other times, he warned me of people at the door/side of the house.
Of course, there are times when I've thought of the song from My Fair Lady, Why can't a woman by more like a man...only I'd sing it, Why can't a dog be more like a cat? But honestly, it's a nice feeling to have a brave pooch like Mr. Nelson.
A few days ago, I had a big fight/argument with my husband Jon. We argued and yelled...felt like a long overdue summer storm. The kind of storm where the air is heavy with warmth, humidity and you can just see the flickers of lightening in a mass of dark clouds. Fortunately, we controlled ourselves till after the kids went to bed. I think this is important...Kids don't need to see/hear all the stuff parents get annoyed with. They won't understand it, till they're in their teens and it just makes them feel bad. As if the argument was about them or something.
So, I have to say it was a big relief to get out these feelings/fears and move on to the next problem. I should note that Jon and I don't really argue that much...It was actually nice to just let loose and not worry about little ears hearing us being immature and silly.
On another note, I'm 90% done with my eldest room. I was hoping to finish it totally but stuff came up. I'm not sure about painting the floor. The color I want is green but somebody still wants blue (with clouds, mind you...). I need to finish the closet as well. This is taking longer than I hoped but the good thing is, it's moving along. Jon doesn't really help me, I've noticed. And oddly, I do more when he's at work. I don't know why. Do I become lazy once he's here? I sometimes think so or more dependant or rather, more talkative, etc.
Last night we watched "The Cat Returns". It is really good esp. if you like cats. It's such a great fairytale story and funny/odd without being disgusting/rude/embarrassing about body functions. All the stuff a lot of American movie creators seem to think kids/adults like but most don't. Well, I don't and never really did...stuff like that should be left in the hallways of junior high or the bathroom. Seriously.
Also, the kids and I have been having nightly youtube watching instead of the junk of the TV. We'll watch classic cartoons from Silly Symphonies, CariCartoons or Bugs/Tom and Jerry. I wonder if Charlie Chaplin is on there. Certainly, I have to watch out for some violent stuff of hitting but on the whole, it's been good.
Monday, July 23, 2007
One week ago today, my new nephew was born. Amazing. I've only seen one picture but I'm sure more are on the way...they better be. lol
This weekend the weather was so wonderful! Blue skies, warm breezes (even slightly cool) and so forth. The perfect weather for flying kites (which we did), going for walks and just enjoying relaxing on the back porch. I did a huge amount of paintings (all miniatures) and then some. I feel good about this.
The greatest thrill was actually cooking up my first zucchini of the garden. I have wanted to do this since we moved here. This is the first time the seeds took and I didn't get them confused with pumpkin seeds (that's what happened another year ago). I feel like I'm finally being rewarded with this little patch of green.
The rabbit fence is working WONDERFULLY! I see forlorn rabbits eyeing my peas and bean poles but nobody can get in. Don't worry about them. As Jon often quotes, the world is a rabbits salad bowl. Also, we often give veggie scrapes to the compost and the rabbit Gods come out for these morsels.
I was a little nervous when I saw a rather large hole by the side of the garden plot...groundhogs? I hope not! Jon did see one meandering down the alley road like a transit looking for new digs, literally. Away, ye groundhogs of vegetable doom!
My bird Odie, is in a fit and has decided to knock all of his gravel out of his gravel holder. I think he's angry because Jon broke his seed container. Or he wants attention even though he snaps when I try to take him out and hold him. Rather, he bites to draw blood, when I take him out.
Anyway, I feel pretty good even if the sky is now overcast with gray clouds and rain is on the forecast.
Last night we went to auntie J's house. I'm not supposed to mention my sis-in-law but how can I not? That's like taking a junk out of my life...anyway, we had Chinese takeout and it was pretty fun. Got to see her kitties and they were nice and friendly.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
It was fun to talk about the pets, I must say. They are a joy in my life and keep me mentally balanced. I'm talking about all my pets, actually. It's funny how having one (or about nine or so) makes you happy. Clean up, isn't always fun, but it's really how you wrap your mind around it.
Anyway, I forgot to take snaps of the reporter and photographer as I was showing off the little critters. Ah, well. Plus, they're going to put a bunch of pics on CUaltoonamirror. So, that's cool! :)
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Had a job interview (which went very well!) today among all the chaos life is moving around. I'm going to be finding out about the part-time position by next week. Hope it works out. It's something I've done before but more intense...caring/assisting seniors. My parents would often do this sort of work and I helped them when I was younger, so I know a bit about what to expect. It can be tough but very rewarding as well.
Then, about 10 minutes ago, I get a call from my vet and she's like, the paper wants to do an interview with owners of rats, do you want to do this? It's because of the movie, Ratatouille. I'm like, Sure! I can't say enough how sweet and charming rats are. Very social, funny and gentle is the rat. So, tomorrow a reporter & photographer are coming over to ask a few questions! Now, I've got to clean the house even more (thank goodness, I scrubbed the porch off earlier with the girls). But this should be fun. I feel pretty excited about it...the question now is, how do I get my paintings of animals in there? hmmmm ;) lol!
The good news is Nathan Edwards Melbinger (8 lbs 9 ounces) was born last night! Healthy and happy, both mom and son. A new nephew...amazing.
The sad news is our friend John in California, is not doing good. A new tumor arose and he looks to only have 6 months. We feel awful about this. The good thing is we know time is all we have. Such a small amount, yes, but we know. I have no idea what I would feel if someone told me I had only 6 more months. Honestly, I don't feel like I have much to prove or try. I think I'd go to more gardens and maybe be a bit more spiritual in regards to lighting candles. The body is such a silly fragile thing. And yet, it's all we really have. I know nobody escapes this world alive and death is so permanent. Sometimes, I think it's such cruel how we are born and have to suffer (whatever that suffering is). But even with all the suffering it's an honor to be alive and to witness the joys of a sunset, love of family and friends, knowing we have done our best to make this world better, being kind to each other and having a good ice cream cone. One of my teachers in 7th grade would say, pretty much every day (he was our homeroom teacher), "Life is tough, and then you die". I don't think it's so bleak as this. I hope not! Sure life is tough, but it's also beautiful if we look for the beauty in it. It's there behind the haze of our conceits and routines.
Every action has a reaction. Sometimes I feel we do so many actions we forget they have reactions. I'm forever grateful to John for starting an art club on the internet. If he hadn't, I would never have met my husband, Jonathan. My life would be completely different. And for this, I'm extremely grateful and blessed.
Monday, July 16, 2007
To a Childhood Friend
Katy, was the girl across the street,
Her hair was the color of the crow,
But being part Irish, she was run to know.
Before the lumber companies came along,
And cut down the forest, not far from our homes
Through those tall trees We would often roam.
And picked the violets by the stream.
And in the sunny month of May, made wreaths of flowering crab apples from the trees near-bye.
Or hunted for cowslip, the trees shady places
as well as the mayflowers in the same places,
But most of all I remember best,
was the recipe for getting rid of freckles,
Go to an old tree stump, and from the water lying within,
Bathe the freckled portion, once or twice.
Although my neighbor friend did so,
Alas/Alack, they did not go, the freckles that is.
-Dorothea Alice Gottshall
This poem is so interesting. It's about friendship and those golden times when kids make worlds of their own. It's also interesting how she mentions the trees being cut down by the lumber companies with a touch of sadness...Also, the humor and a bit of folklore about freckles. Just an enchanting sort of world, really.
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Saturday, July 14, 2007
Friday, July 13, 2007
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Feeling a bit tired (considering it's midnight, that's not a surprise). I guess I feel tired and nervous. My sis-in-law is due and I keep having dreams about the baby and all that. Hopefully, everything will be all right.
I also feel a bit deflated about art and my work in particular. I guess I just feel sort of flat at the moment. I know this is a temporary feeling...and one that is induced by my feeling tired. What I need to do is sleep and break out the paints.
I played a bunch of kids video games with the gals...mostly PBS stuff and now my eyes are burning/blurry. I really don't care for that stuff and it bothers me to think what it's doing to kids eyes...fortunately, this was the longest we ever did video games (1-2 hours with a few breaks). Still, annoying.
I need to start a new project and finish a few. I think this will make me feel better and get me inspired. I was looking at the Graphic art illustrator book and was feeling WAY overwhelmed...and defeatist. So many choices and places and competitions....drives me mad. But I decided to choose 5 places to submit from two categories and give them 6 months. I'm going to do a collage/study as to what I need to get done and how. It's more like a visually brainstorm, I guess. Just to help me focus and know what to do. Actually, I think I might do this in other areas of my life as well. See if this brain storming helps...
Two weeks ago, I found an essay I did when I was 14 years old. I could not believe how prophetic it was. I had everything from writing books, getting a Masters in Art, marriage and kids in there! It really made me smile and feel like I'm not so much off my personal path as I thought. It made me feel really good, actually. I think parents with kids of this age or school teachers or friends/aunts/ etc should have kids write this sort of personal letter/essay and keep it. I don't know if this means I was/am a realist but it certainly is eerie how I followed this plan. :) I'm glad I found this.
On a different note, I've been dancing to Paul Eugene's workout on Youtube (Be careful, it has a loud audio). It's quite good...I love the positive energy and just the spirit of this guy. Everyone should have a Paul Eugene inside of them.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
I have to do more unpacking and put away things. Plus, there is lots of organizing and planning as I may have some house guests coming over in August.
I got an email that my niece is doing a summer youth camp (her first away from home) and want to send her a little note (hopefully it will reach her).
This heat is rather too much and I'm glad to be back to water the plants and look over my pets. Thankfully, we could borrow Jon's folks car which has a great AC system and is roomy.
Apparently, my cats were doing well till today and had a protest poop in the bath. They usually act up by the 3rd day or so, if I'm travelling.
Anyway, it was a fun time and we got to see intersting thrift stores, go to Lake Erie (which seems like a different time zone), and learn a little about where my grandmother was from (Euclid, Ohio). I had a strange sort of feeling as though I was driving down the very streets/roads some of my ancestors may have traveled. It was a good feeling.
On the way home, I couldn't help crying and thinking how time does fly by so quickly and how my friend and I are changing/have changed. But not in a bad way, in the least. It was strange to reflect on what we did as kids/young adulthood. Not that I'm this aged, all knowing person...lol! I just feel like I'm getting more perspective and that can't be bad.
Nelson was happy to see us and Odie was chirping away. The cats were all pleased and well as are the rats. I'm glad I put their cage in the basement as it's cool and pleasant down there.
It's funny how a few days from home makes you feel refreshed and glad to be back. It's nice to get away and even better to come home (even to a stinky house).