Tuesday, July 17, 2007

The Good and The Bad

How can you write about the sad bits of life when they seem to swallow you up and make the good bittersweet? That's how I feel right now.

The good news is Nathan Edwards Melbinger (8 lbs 9 ounces) was born last night! Healthy and happy, both mom and son. A new nephew...amazing.

The sad news is our friend John in California, is not doing good. A new tumor arose and he looks to only have 6 months. We feel awful about this. The good thing is we know time is all we have. Such a small amount, yes, but we know. I have no idea what I would feel if someone told me I had only 6 more months. Honestly, I don't feel like I have much to prove or try. I think I'd go to more gardens and maybe be a bit more spiritual in regards to lighting candles. The body is such a silly fragile thing. And yet, it's all we really have. I know nobody escapes this world alive and death is so permanent. Sometimes, I think it's such cruel how we are born and have to suffer (whatever that suffering is). But even with all the suffering it's an honor to be alive and to witness the joys of a sunset, love of family and friends, knowing we have done our best to make this world better, being kind to each other and having a good ice cream cone. One of my teachers in 7th grade would say, pretty much every day (he was our homeroom teacher), "Life is tough, and then you die". I don't think it's so bleak as this. I hope not! Sure life is tough, but it's also beautiful if we look for the beauty in it. It's there behind the haze of our conceits and routines.

Every action has a reaction. Sometimes I feel we do so many actions we forget they have reactions. I'm forever grateful to John for starting an art club on the internet. If he hadn't, I would never have met my husband, Jonathan. My life would be completely different. And for this, I'm extremely grateful and blessed.

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