Wednesday, September 11, 2013

anxious

I'm having a bad cause of anxiety. I'm lashing out at people and just feeling miserable. I know it's partially from not feeling good (a cold), not wearing my compression socks today (so I feel achy) and some stuff that is about to change. It comes down to me feeling really rigid right now and not wanting to budge or be flexible. I'm not going to write anymore about it because I'll just vent and I'll do that in my journal...and save everyone from unneeded lashings from me.

Also, this month is very stressful emotionally. It's the month of my dad's passing 1 year ago.  So, I know a lot of what I'm feeling is connected to this. My mom said to make a pecan pie in honor of m dad. I like this very much...not a fan of pecan pie but my hubby is. So, it won't go to waste.

I feel stressed out that I've put off finishing my dad's cremation box. I started it and then stopped. Well, its partially health, mourning and other stuff. But I feel like, it's been so long. I will try to finish it and not worry if it's not perfect and just do my best. I guess I felt so guilty that i didn't finish it. I actually feel better that I wrote that out and not so angry at my self.

I've been pulling out old art works and working on them. Maybe I'll just put them on Etsy or eBay. I don't know...it feels like everything takes time. I'll add them to my portfolio as well.

I must be feeling sick because I feel emotional and sad. I hate colds. Going to take some pain pills in a few and go from there. Plus, today was so icky with humidity, thunder storms blowing over and I just felt miserable.

I actually did do some watercolor art and had a good time with that. Harrison has a full blown cold but is (thank God) over his hives. I'm so glad the meds are working and he's feeling/looks like his old self.

My goal this week is to take things slowly. Don't rush and keep calm. I was feeling better earlier and even wanted to do my Just Dance workout but when I got home, just felt bad.


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