Monday, February 06, 2006

Wearing your beliefs on your sleeve...

I've thought about this for awhile now...do you show people what you believe or think on a blog? Or do you just hide what you think and feel? This has been on my mind a lot lately.

I started to think about that Ellen Degeneres movie, the one were she falls in love with this guy who appears to be perfection itself. He confesses that he never feels like he can relax and always has to put on a front. She tells him to be himself, let go and the next thing you know he's totally over the top psycho. Funny stuff ensues and before you know it, he reveals an obsessive manic personality.

I sometimes feel like that. Not that I'm obsessive or manic but that I feel like I just want to "reveal" whatever it is about myself and not worry if it makes people happy or makes me have more/less art contacts. But a part of me is like, whoa, there girl...rein yourself in you don't want to step on anyone's toes or get yours mashed by someone else. And I don't. I don't want to get in a fix because I said something or what not. I'd rather be polite.

However, there is a part of me that would like to just smash one or two things out there. Just to have the wit and argumentative ability to really pull out a zinger or two, but I don't.
There's a line I love in the movie "Lemony Snickett's A series of Unfortunate Events" that goes something like this...And the crowd went just at Count Olaf's level and paid back everything he had done to the children and more. I often think of taking the morally high ground, but sometimes, sometimes...

That being said, I feel I'm pretty open about how I feel and think. I really don't hide very much and I don't really want to expose my inner dark spots because they are just like everyone else's...and kind of boring to say the least.



So, I don't have a mutated twin attached to my lower spine, I don't have a mental illness that makes me have x-ray vision and I'm pretty much liberal and have bouts of doubt and belief about God or no God and I'm shy but very friendly and I'm on the chubby side and very tall (though I don't think being 6' or, as some would say, 5'12, is that tall).



What am I trying to say? I guess I'm glad I've "revealed" all that I have in my little blog here and I don't feel like it's bad to do that. In fact, I think that's what makes reading someone's blog interesting. If I just had a bunch of colors or piles of sticks, people might get a bit bored. Though, come to think of it, piles of sticks can be very interesting...hmm, might have to do that come the summer...get piles of sticks and photograph them. Maybe when we go hiking...





3 comments:

Carol said...

That Mr. Wrong movie sounds like it says it all. Funny.
I feel more comfortable with people/bloggers that aren't trying to appear perfect.

Emily said...

Thanks, Carol. I feel the same way...perfection is over-rated, I think. ; )

sister celtic said...

THIS IS GREAT... I SAY WHATEVER I WANT AND NEVER HIDE THE REAL ME..PEOPLE EITHER LIKE ME OR THEY DON'T....SOME HAVE SAID "IF ONLY PEOPLE WOULD GET TO KNOW YOU " THEY WOULD BE BLESSED TO KNOW YOU... I AM ATTRACTED TO FRIENDSHIPS THAT ARE HONEST AND REAL..WHEN I DIE AND GO TO HEAVEN I DON'T WANT ONE PERSON TO BE ABLE TO SAY I KNEW SISTER CELTIC AND SHE NEVER TOLD ME....I WAS IN A ROUGH PART OF A TOWN ONE TIME AT A DENNYS RESTRAUNT AND THE PLACE WAS PACKED WITH KIDS AND PARENTS GOING TO A STATE TRACK MEET.THESE TWO WOMEN WERE WAITRESSES BEHIND THE COUNTER AS MY HUBBIE AND I SAT RIGHT UP AT THE COUNTER ON STOOLS , NO OTHER PLACE TO SIT... WELL ONE TOUGH OL GIRL WAS FILLING A GLASS WITH COLD MILK AND WAS JUST FRAAZZLED BY THE CROWD AND DEMANDS.... ALL I HEARD HER FRIEND SAY TO HER WHILE FILLING THE GLASS WAS " JUST DO IT SADIE , JUST DO IT, YOU'LL FEEL BETTER" WELL SHE TOOK THE GLASS OF MILK AND SLAMMED IT TO THE FLOOR GLASS SHATTERING ALL OVER THE COUNTER ETC. WE WERE JUST STUNNED.. I WHISPERED TO THE WOMAN NEXT TO ME AND SAID " UM DID YOU SEE THAT?' SHE SAID "UM YES" AND I SAID I THINK WE BETTER LEAVE BEFORE GUNS AND KNIVES COME OUT.. SO TO THIS DAY MY HUBBIE AND I ALWAYS SAY "JUST DO IT SADIE , YOU'LL FEEL BETTER!" I THINK YOU GOT THE HANG OF IT.. GIGGLE

Sociable

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